January 21, 2015

withdrawal.

I've been thinking a lot about the motives behind every little thing I do on a daily basis, and about living my life as if even the most mundane tasks are an act of worship to the God that poured out everything for me.

Whatever you do, work at it wholeheartedly as though you were doing it for the Lord and not merely for people. (Colossians 3:23 ISV)

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In a season of prayer and fasting, I've found myself yet again stripped bare. I'm reminded of the fig leaves Adam and Eve sewed together to try and cover their nakedness (the very first attempt by humans to cover their own shame with the work of their own hands). I have too many fig leaf garments hanging in my spiritual closet.

As much as I yearn for a simple life, I keep adding unnecessary layers to our days- why do I feel the need to plan every single thing and keep our life so tightly controlled? It's the most frightening thing to let go and surrender to a plan not of my own making.

Resisting the urge to set a specific course for the next few weeks, I know I need to withdraw and experience the quiet that happens with no schedule and no expectations. I'm hungry for something that's still nameless. But even though I don't know what I'm seeking, I know it's the only thing that will fill me.

I wait quietly before God,
for my victory comes from him.
He alone is my rock and my salvation,
my fortress where I will never be shaken. (Psalm 62:1-2 NLT)

I'll see you guys in a little while, ok?

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